i live in a cowboy town. granted, i have always lived in cowboy towns, but it sometimes is easy to look by that.

but NOT when convenience store clerks greet you by saying “howdy”.

after hearing this greeting, i turned to the clerk and paused before continuing into the store. didn’t mean to, but pretty sure i may have scowled a bit. there’s nothing WRONG with this culture (maybe) but it has consistently annoyed me my entire life. i groan when i hear country music on the radio. i am horrible at waking up in the morning (alarm clocks don’t seem to do it), so i set the alarm to a country music station and put the alarm clock on the floor on the other side of the room. that way, at 7AM, country music blares and i shoot out of bed, lumber over, slamming the switch to “off”. i am far too annoyed to go back to sleep, so i stay up. totally works for me, but man does it get the day off to a bad start.

the thing is that the “cowboy” culture and the “country” culture really doesn’t apply anywhere anymore. like, of course, that sort of culture is important to small farming communities, but in big metropolitan communities where shania and mcgraw still thrive…. i just kinda dont get it.

you see this guy walking down a busy city street? he draws stares.

i don’t even know who this dude is, i just typed “country music singer” into google image search.

this is not acceptable dress in today’s culture. no country singer fits into a crowd. except for this one.

i <3 u carrie!!!!1

but moving on to the topic of grimace

just WHAT IS HE

lets determine this by the means of elimination

GRIMACE IS:

- jolly

- purple

- oddly proportioned

- at least 400 pounds

GRIMACE IS NOT:

- human

- capable of scent

- ashamed of his nakedness

- an authority on non-burger related issues

CONCLUSION:

- some kind of hippopotamus?

honestly, even i’m kind of surprised at what went on in this blog post

jkd